Going Rogue
by kimmary
Summary: Set post Legend 2, the truth is revealed. Tony's worst nightmare is about to come true, life as Ziva knows it will change forever. But when it comes down to it - can they do what has to be done, what needs to be done? After all, orders are orders...


**Disclaimer: I don't own the NCIS characters, their personalities or their story lines... the only thing I do own is my imagination... **

A/N: Thought I would take a break from Teamwork to do a one-shot... Okay, this is my own take on what's going to happen…. Please forgive me if this is wildly off-base, but I am South African, so all my info on both season five and six so far is based on what I have read on the net and watched on U-Tube - including the preview for epi 24.... This is set immediately after Legends part 2. Hope you enjoy the read.

**Going rogue...**

Ziva was not where she wanted to be. Oh, she knew it was where she needed to be, had to be. But that didn't mean she wanted to be here, lying in Michael's arms. Listening to his satisfied snore, his beating heart, she cringed. Tried to get comfortable, to gain some semblance of normality, of a woman who was in love, of a woman who desired this man she lay beside. She thought back to the words she said to Tony all those months ago when he was Agent Afloat:

"_You may not like them, but that's why they are called orders__."_

She should get some sleep. She needed to get some sleep. She had to be alert to face what she knew was inevitable.

But her thoughts kept going back to earlier, to the team, to Tony. Things had changed, were changing and she was powerless to stop it.

If she were honest with herself, things hadn't been the same for months now. They were different. She had pulled away. Secrets had come between them. And she knew, it didn't matter what happened from here on out. Things would never be the same. She would once again be the outcast, the despised. And there was nothing she could do about it.

She had been avoiding Tony. Defensive. Allusive. She put a wall up between them. She avoided the office, only sitting at her desk when it was absolutely imperative. He knew her too well. And if she sat opposite him long enough, he would figure it all out. She couldn't let down her guard. It would jeopardize everything she had worked for.

He asked if they were fighting, if she was angry with him. He asked her if she would tell him if she knew where Rivkin was, and she knew her words would hurt him. Which is why she said them. Why she told him that she would tell Gibbs rather than confide in him. The final nail in their… relationship.

How could she tell him that she was just protecting him, protecting the team? He would want to make everything right, to do everything by the book. But sometimes you have to throw out the rule book and follow your own.

She failed today and she knew it. She couldn't help herself. She wanted confirmation. She needed confirmation. Some reminder of who they used to be. Which is why she asked him if he were jealous. It was the second time in as many days she had asked this question. Both in reference to comments he made about the man she was currently lying with, the man whose scent was still on her skin. And again, he denied it. Had he admitted that he was jealous she knew that she wouldn't be here, now. Dangerous, thinking this way.

Tony knew she was up to something. That she was hiding something. He believed she was a traitor. And she was.

She was trained for this. To deceive. To lie. To betray. She had to ensure that no one suspected anything. No matter how it tore her up. Because orders are orders, particularly when they come from the director of Mossad - your father.

She sighed again, and Rivkin's arm tightened against her, pulling her closer. She involuntarily stiffened, then forced herself to relax. It would all soon be over. But at what cost? Her life? His?

* * *

She was sitting at her desk when they arrived the next morning. Concentrating on the screen in front of her. Her fingers lightly flying over the keys. She could feel, rather than see Tony looking at her as he put down his rucksack and slowly sat in his chair.

The atmosphere was different today. There was no laughter, no joking, no gentle ribbing.

McGee was at his desk, lovingly decorated by Abby, glancing nervously, first at the Senior Special Agent then the Mossad officer, and back again. There was a distinct chill in the air and a feeling of… mistrust?

Tony leaned back in his chair, his hands behind his head, his feet out as he watched Ziva under hooded eyes, a look that McGee could not quite fathom on his face – Disapointment? Anger? Loathing?

What had he missed? He hadn't been in LA that long. Maybe Abby could fill him in. He pushed back his chair, the foil balloons rustling as he stood. It took him a while to disentangle himself from the floating obstacles, pulling the chair with him and almost, but not quite falling. He regained his balance, and picked up his upturned chair. Shook himself off and looked up at his colleagues. Nothing. No comments. No jokes. In fact, they hadn't even looked over at him. DiNozzo was still watching Ziva, and she was now fervently whispering into her phone, her head bent, her hair spilling over her face, her hand cupping the receiver.

McGee stood. Uncertain. Unsure. The phone slamed down. Ziva stares at it for a few seconds, and a glimmer of emotion flickers briefly. But before he can recognize it, place it, it has gone. Without saying another word, she reaches for her rucksack, and swinging it over her shoulder, walks out.

Tony looks up, sees Gibbs on the stairs – watching. Standing, he shakes his head, runs his hands through his hair leaving it sticking up and pushes his shoulders back. Gibbs marches past towards his "conference room" beckoning DiNozzo. The lift doors close and McGee remains. Standing. Confused.

Abby. Abby will be able to help. But before he gets to the stairs, the lift doors open. Gibbs steps out. Alone. Walks past him as if he isn't even there and starts up the stairs. Turning, he says "Ya coming, probie?"

* * *

In the Lab, Tony is watching Abby's screen. Ziva doesn't know, but Tony has met Rivkin. Had coffee with him, just that morning. And he didn't like what he saw. How can Ziva fall for a guy like this? Aside from the fact that he using Mossad as his cover for murder. He is too smooth. Too perfect. Too deadly. But, the clever Mossad agent isn't so clever after all is he? Tony bugged him – in more ways than one.

The paperwork is signed and sealed. Rivkin will be taken down. He will not get away with murder, no matter who is helping him, or how it hurts them. Tony still cannot believe Ziva is involved. But she has to be. There is no other explanation. She has played them all. How long had this been going on? A few months, a year, since she insinuated herself into the team? Had it all been a big joke to her? He can picture her and Rivkin sitting there, laughing at the stupid NCIS agents. He doesn't know how he is going to break this to Abby. She will be devastated.

"I've got it. And without a Caf-Pow," Abby adds, almost accusatory. "He's…" she trails off. They both know the address that flashes up on screen. Tony's gut instinct is confirmed. He has to stop him….them. His stomach churns at the thought. Will he be able to turn a gun on her, when the time comes? Can he kill her, if he needs to?

"Tell Gibbs," Tony says. "And tell him, tell him that what we feared has been confirmed," he chokes out as he bolts from the lab.

"Wait, shouldn't you have backup? And what do you mean confirmed. Is Ziva okay" Abby questions, fear in her voice, the phone receiver dangling in her hand. But she is talking to herself.

* * *

Tony uses the key Ziva gave him for emergencies. Not waiting to think about what he will be walking into – them, in bed, naked, tangled bodies. Her screaming his name. He cannot think this way. He doesn't know how deep in she is. But, he is guessing it is pretty deep. And this isn't going to have a happy ending. He takes a deep breath. His gun at the ready. Knowing that he will do what he has to do. For the oath he took, for his team. No matter how it destroys him. He once thought he could love her. But, now, there is just a coldness, a darkness in his heart. He is ready – in more ways than one.

He doesn't expect Rivkin to be sitting, nonchalantly reading the newspaper. He looks up as Tony enters the room, gun drawn. Tony looks around quickly. Demands Rivkin stands, hands out. Walks towards him, pulling the cuffs.

"Looking for Ziva? She is…otherwise occupied," Rivkin smirks, pointing to the knife still wet with blood.

Tony hesitates, for just a split second. But it is long enough. Rivkin dives at him, they tussle, but Rivkin has the added advantage and soon Tony is clasped in a headlock. Just a bit more pressure – and his neck will snap. Tony starts to lose consciousness – the darkness coming to claim him. He hears the roaring in his ears and then what sounds like Ziva. A hiss, a yell, a gunshot. And then all goes black.

* * *

A few hours later, McGee, Abby and Tony sit waiting in the now empty NCIS office. Tony nursing an extremely sore head and bruised throat. Ducky has checked him out and cleared him. Now they wait. Ziva had been sealed up in MTAC with Gibbs and Vance for the past few hours. Since she shot Rivkin, killing him instantly.

She had been a traitor – but not to them. She had been working deep undercover since she was reassigned to Israel. Director David's orders. It has been easy to convince her ex-partner and lover that she wanted to revisit their relationship. Cocky as he was, he had been none the wiser. None of them had. She had been ordered to do whatever it took to ensure her cover. Even if it meant jepardising her career with NCIS, even if it meant lying to those she was closest to. Even if it meant…

Tony can't look at the other two, as they sit exchanging worried glances. He had truly thought Ziva was rogue. That she had chosen Rivkin over them, over him. He hadn't trusted her. He had broken Rules 3: Don't believe what you are told. Double Check, 8:Never take anything for granted and 15: Always work as a team. More importantly, he had totally disregarded Gibbs's number one rule: Never screw over your partner.

The doors to MTAC open, and they watch Ziva with her head hung low, walk down the stairs. Broken. Guilt and shame all over her face. This is not the Ziva he knows. Where is the life, the anger, the fire? Her eyes are dark, dead.

In Tony fashion, the only way to protect yourself is to go on the defensive. Which he does. He needs to know she was still in there. Standing, he blocks her way.

"Move, Tony. Unless you want to get hurt." She seethes.

"You are a hypocrite." He states, as she reaches up and slaps him. He closes his eyes briefly, before continuing, unabated. "You blamed me for months for keeping secrets from the team – from you. And yet you did the self same thing. How easy was it for you – to climb into bed with a man you knew to be a murderer?"

She slaps him him again, this time harder. He stares her down, the print of her hand visible on his cheek. McGee and Abby look over to Gibbs, waiting for him to intervene. But he shakes his head gently, motioning them back.

"And you, you didn't sleep with Jeanne under pretence? It's okay for you though, is it not. You are a man. It is expected of you." She spits out.

"I fell in love with her," he roars. "And she was an innocent in that whole debarcle. She wasn't a cold-blooded killer."

He is now standing toe-to-toe with her.

"We all know how well that turned out for you, do we not? And for your information Tony. Michael was my previous partner. I put my life in his hands. I trusted him. I loved him." she declares.

"And now he is dead. I killed him – to save you." She adds quietly. "If you will excuse me. I have to go clean his blood off my living room floor."

She turns. To walk away, but he reaches out, catching her hand, pulling her into a tight embrace. She pushes against him, half-heartedly trying to break free.

"Let it go, Zi. Let it go." He whispers into her hair. And she does, her body relaxing, she clings to him. Soft, gut-wrenching sobs drenching the front of his shirt. Still holding her tightly against his chest, he reaches out with the other to Abby. She stands on one side of Ziva, wrapping her arms around her and Tony, gesturing for McGee to do the same. Gibbs pushes himself off the desk. Standing behing Ziva, he encloses the circle - of family - of friends. His eyes meet Tony's over Ziva's head, a slight nod of his head that is reciprocated. An acknowledgement that Ziva will heal, they will survive, the team will become stronger than before. All they need is time - they already have each other.


End file.
